Webbed Wing – Vol. III | Album Review

Memory Music

No matter how many parties you attend, vacations you plan, or hours you spend napping under a blue sky, there’s always a point in the summer when the sun’s glow turns into sunburns. Suddenly, the season’s promise becomes covered in sweat and mosquito bites. The once-endless days that stretched before you are now hazy nights long behind you. When the sun goes down, it’s all briefly too much: too hot, too humid, the day was too long, and oh yeah, are my friends, like, mad at me or something? Did I suck at that party I just left? Why is the bar always so crowded? It's like 100 degrees out. Do I just need to drink water or something? The overwhelming nature of the season sets as fast and low as a sudden summer storm cloud.

With guitars that test how high your car speakers can go and lyrics that dictate a spiraling internal monologue, Superheaven’s Taylor Madison and Jake Clarke are back with Mike Paulshock for Webbed Wing’s loudest project yet, Vol. III. The group’s third album solidifies the genre-melding music Webbed Wing is best at–combining garage grunge, 90s alt-radio rock, and fuzzed-out country with their signature guitar shredding. Through ten tracks, Vol. III, soundtracks that looming feeling that you did something wrong at a house party, and also maybe your whole life, while you sit on a plastic lawn chair in jorts. 

If you weren’t ready to rock out with the album’s opener, “Further,” you have about two seconds to brace yourself before “Tortuga” kicks in. The chords hang low, surrounded by static, as Madison laments the bitter feeling that he drags the people around him down. This is a common thread throughout the album, a near-obsessive worry about how others might see you–not how they actually criticize you, but how you think they might. Through the song, the pang of insecurity winds through the guitar strings as the opening static builds into the first livewire solo of the album. The repeated lyrics fold into the melody as the guitar soars and dives in a way that feels almost improvised if it wasn’t so precise. The solo is full of frustration but pushes forward, ultimately crossing the finish line of the impossible race the lyrics describe.

If “Further” was a race, then “So It Goes” is an all-out sprint. It’s the music for a montage at a particularly frustrating part of a movie, and it’s the song that will make you jump at a show. The track feels chasmic as it repeats the universal conclusion, “You’re never gonna get what you feel like you’re owed.” While in other bands this might be a particularly grim lyric, spiteful even, it’s not with Webbed Wing. Instead, it’s factual; it’s just a reality-based observation. The band threads this declaration through the song and ties it together with a relentlessly heavy drum beat, delivering a crushing weight before a brief lull.

The final hum of “So It Goes” feeds directly into “Hero’s Death” – the closest Vol. III ever gets to a breather. The song diverts from the cannonballing drums and pick slides for quieter introspection, allowing the audience a brief period of reflection now that they’ve reached the halfway point. It sits amongst other recent ballad breaks like Militarie Gun’s “See You Around” or Liquid Mike’s “Am,” and its twang feels evocative of Ratboys’ “Black Earth, WI.” While other songs on the album use indirectness to convey their observations, this one looks the listener straight on and relies on layers of self-doubt combined with tongue-in-cheek overconfidence to protect itself from vulnerability. While the personal lyrics toe the line between humor and honesty, the outrageous desires laid out in the lyrics meet the sound, creating a huge and spiraling song. After sitting on your roof in a panic about how weird the summer has been, it’s the equivalent of tipping your head back, breathing in the night air, and staring at the stars sprawling across the sky. It’s not a solution, but it’s a break.

Past an always-appreciated whistle break in “Change Me,” the Nashville keyboard in “I Shared a Cell,” and the psychedelia-infused riffs of “Take It From Me” are the final barnstormers of the album. Vol. III (and Webbed Wing generally) is, first and foremost, a necessary case study on why guitars are the coolest thing in the world, and “Where Mortal Men Dare Not Tread” is the album’s best example. It’s a stoner rock instrumental track that digs its roots deep and spirals up, big and bold, casting a shadow on the rest of the songs. It looms, it sneers, it has a harmonica. Fueled by brash kinetic energy, it reminds me of the relentless buzz of cicadas on a summer night and the feeling that the night sky that briefly offered solace might crash down around you at any moment. 

The album ends on “My Front Door,” the last chance for Webbed Wing to throw in everything they have. The closer takes several turns, switching between the final song a radio station DJ might play before their shift ends and the encore a beloved country act would break out at the end of a festival after the amps have already been humming with hours of electricity. But its finality is apparent as it lulls the album to a natural close. Between a stadium drumbeat, a brief bass solo, and guitar riffs outrunning the rest of the song, “My Front Door” feels like the sun is slowly coming up on the horizon. 

Every weird, gross summer night will end eventually, and the sun will come up. That doesn’t mean that things that ignited exhaustion are suddenly gone; it’s just an assurance that there will always be another day. Similarly, Webbed Wing is not in the business of just saying it’ll be fine, it will happen, and it will eventually be over, and it might happen again. So, unstick your thighs from that lawn chair, turn off the porch light, and call it a night. 


Caro Alt’s (she/her) favorite thing in the world is probably collecting CDs. Caro is from New Orleans, Louisiana and spends her time not sorting her CD collection even though she really, really needs to.

Excuse Me, Who Are You? – Double Bind | Album Review

Thumbs Up Records

I have a sinking feeling that I was a lot cooler two years ago. Back then, I was on top of new releases, ran like 20 miles a week, and always sang in the shower. Now, most days, I feel like I’m aspiring to be my old self. I lived abroad for two years and realized a few things pretty quickly: you never get back the time you spend, last-minute international plane tickets are heartbreakingly expensive, and there’s no such thing as a “makeup” funeral. I moved home last month, and, in a recent effort to correct course, I’ve been listening to “The Good Life” by Weezer twice a day (doctor’s orders) and leaning back into my old interests. Specifically, I’ve been reading way between the lines of music I like.

Excuse Me, Who Are You? (stylized as EMWAY) popped up on my radar two years ago, just after I left the US. Their debut single, “... In The Test Chamber,” was a 4-minute mission statement released in early 2022, showcasing everything the group brought to the Wisconsin emo scene and screamo at large. Noisy and unconstrained, the song was an instant addition to my running playlist, and I’ve listened to it multiple times a week since then. At the time, I remember being surprised that there was only one bangin’ single from an act that was clearly going somewhere. Luckily, I didn’t have to wait long for the group to release their Half-Life-themed EP About That Beer I Owed Ya in October of the same year. 

Two years later, EMWAY have doubled down on their companion-piece method and screamed out an 18-minute LP where every song references or samples the film Perfect Blue, a 1998 animated psychological thriller directed by Satoshi Kon. The album takes its name from the movie’s fictional film-within-a-film, Double Bind. The release was accompanied by an impressively orchestrated rollout campaign with interviews, features in zines and blogs, music videos, and watch parties. 

It might surprise listeners to learn Double Bind has been in the making since 2021, even before EMWAY’s EP. In addition to crushing vocals, driving percussion, and aggressive but tappy guitar work, the album has tasteful flourishes and consistent theming throughout, making the whole piece strikingly cohesive. The lyrics “I think about it all the time / I think about you all the time” from “https://mimasroom.com” exemplifies the sentiment of rumination heard throughout the album and even calls back to the band’s EP, where the same lyrics are present in “Chicken Cock.” 

Sound bites introduce and conclude several songs, and ambient cues in key positions weave a unique soundscape with a careful balance between in-your-face despair and faraway ennui. These small details work together to make the album feel like an 18-minute musical short story rather than eight individual songs. Every song has forward momentum that pushes you through charged riffs, drags you under waves of twinkly atmosphere, and pummels you with throat-shredding vocal demonstrations.

Now, I’ve listened to a ton of emo and emo-adjacent music, and any time I hear a sample, I throw the song into a playlist called “Emo Media Recs.” I like to find these samples organically and mostly keep this playlist for myself as a reminder to watch the movies, TV shows, or video games that are referenced because I think understanding the broader context can give greater depth to the song. Most bands that do this sort of sampling might have one or two songs on an album with a sample, but those samples are usually from different places. EMWAY is unique in this aspect because every song of theirs has a reference of some kind, either to Half-Life in the case of their EP or Perfect Blue in the case of this new album. It’s fair to say this thing is absolutely littered with references and heavy themes, stuff that’s sure to get stuck in your teeth.

My favorite track is “https://mimasroom.com,” which is titled after a fictitious blog from Perfect Blue. The blog is written by a fan impersonating their idealized version of the main character’s former pop persona (I promise that string of words makes sense, please just watch the movie). In real life, the link takes you to an active website supporting the film, also including some blog entries we see in the movie. It’s a cool late 90’s stab at immersive media, with all the nostalgic ephemera you would expect from a blog on the early internet. This song sticks out to me for its impressive blending of styles and awesome feature from Caleb Hynes of Hey, Ily; its placement as the fourth track is the perfect switch-up. The bits of ambience in songs before feel like they lead up to this sort of faraway composition, and the more subdued parts of the album afterward feel like they’re recalling this song as a memory. Hey, Ily’s particular talent for blending chiptune and lo-fi techniques with shouts, screams, and in-betweens is front-and-center here and caused me to immediately revisit their 2022 album Psychokinetic Love Songs.

On the topic of featured musicians, four out of eight tracks on the album showcase emo talents from across the Midwest. In addition to Caleb Hynes from Hey, Ily, Tyler Stodghill of Stars Hollow is featured on the album’s lead single, “Maybe That Truck Hit Me… And This Is All a Dream…” Stars Hollow also recently released an EP that fellow Swimmer Brandon Cortez reviewed here. Next are Madison locals Ben Ludens of Tiny Voices and Maxwell Culver of Endswell, featured on “Volcano Balls” and “Double Bind,” respectively. Endswell, who shares band members with EMWAY, just released their debut EP, with a review soon to come on this very site! Clearly, there is a lot of emo talent in one geographic location, and all the groups embody DIY ethics that keep friends together and push the scene to new heights. This sort of team-up can also be seen on Tiny Voices’ 2023 album Make Up Your Place, which features both Endswell and EMWAY. It’s a good feeling to hear great artists working with other great artists, and I have officially put “See an emo show in Madison” on my list of “Life Goals for 2024” because of this album. 

Despite the name, I don’t actually think Double Bind is about being caught between a rock and a hard place. The lyrics from Kyle Kinney are about his father’s passing, past relationships, and friends, which makes the title an interesting choice. My definition of a double bind is “being forced to make a losing choice in an emotionally tumultuous power imbalance, where no other course of action is possible or appropriate.” The movie Perfect Blue follows a young woman who finds herself in such a situation after jumping ship from a middling career as a pop star to try acting, where the roles are much more demanding than she anticipated. She has no way back from this choice and begins to lose her sense of self, at times believing she is the character she plays in the film-within-a-film, Double Bind. To me, this album has much more to do with losing your sense of self than with the literal concept of a lose-lose situation.

Grief haunts you. Losing someone changes you, often in ways we can’t understand until months or years later. Even after understanding, parts of your identity may be lost or changed forever. It’s a natural process of growing older, but knowing that doesn’t make it less painful or easier to deal with. Double Bind is a reaction to that grief, collecting honest bits of self-reflection, voicing frustration at life, and delivering a fulfilling musical performance, all neatly tied together with the thread from an old anime. EMWAY needed this album to get it all off their chest, setting themselves up for growth and the next big thing.


Braden is a nerdy guy from small-town Kansas who is really into emo music. He is working towards a PhD in experimental particle physics, but when he isn’t struggling to do data science, he’s running around and normally listening to good music too. You can find more of him on Substack, Twitter, Instagram, Strava, GitHub, or TikTok @braden.allmond.

Bacchae – Next Time | Album Review

Get Better Records

The Trader Joe’s near my job lost their effort to unionize last year. It was a tied vote, which legally counts as a loss for those attempting to consolidate worker power. The employees reported consistent union-busting tactics, including tried and true lies about losing beneficial aspects of the job if the union comes into place. All the time and energy people put into collectivizing their place of employment was gone just like that. I had talked with a worker there multiple times about the effort, and the defeat in their voice when they told me it ended in a tie was crushing.

What do you do when the momentum fueling change is cut short? Working-class people have to balance their time between working shit jobs to earn a living, running tedious errands like grocery shopping and laundry, and engaging with pastimes that make living worthwhile. So it is understandable that, when attempts to improve our conditions are shut down, we retrench and hold on to the small comforts we have in the status quo.

This position is where we find Bacchae on Next Time, their first record since 2020’s stunning Pleasure Vision. The band sounds paralyzed over worldly and deeply personal attempts to improve their conditions. Next Time is the sound of knowing the world is fucked and feeling powerless to make any change. 

Bacchae illustrates the dehumanization of wage workers, like my local Trader Joe’s team, on lead single “Cooler Talk,” in which Katie McD sings about how “they treat us like dogs / in a comfortable cage.” When McD sings this, I’m reminded of the Hotelier’s controversial ballad “Housebroken,” which uses an abused dog as a metaphor for those who buy into the status quo. Sure, we may have a comfortable cage and a constant supply of new toys, but that’s only to distract us from the fact that barely scraping by isn’t the life we deserve. No matter how much we buy into the system, McD reminds us that “our degradation is priceless / it keeps it all afloat.” Our captors have no interest in improving our actual conditions, but they’re willing to throw us a bone whenever we get a little too restless. 

Next Time is full of tracks grappling with labor exploitation, but while “Cooler Talk” is fit for the crowd at the barricade to finger-point over each others’ heads as they scream along to cries of “run me raw,” Bacchae throw in fun curveballs with tracks like the astoundingly catchy “Dead Man.” The syncopated rhythms and dancehall keys make the cautionary tale of dying at your desk even more haunting as bassist Rena Hagins sings with glee that “he wanted much more.” It’s as if she’s singing from the perspective of a manager laughing at someone for dreaming of a life outside of the company. 

“Dead Man” is what happens when you’re lucky after buying into the system. You’re allowed to grow old in slight discomfort, but on the title track, McD makes clear that the opposite is equally possible: “Tomorrow you’ll be just the same / squealing like a popped balloon.” What is the point of buying into the status quo? It takes just as much hope to dream you’ll be on top someday as to envision a better world for everyone. 

And that’s where the album opens on “Try,” McD sounds tired as she begs, and pleads, and kicks, and screams for a scarp of imagination in the chorus. Throughout the song, Andrew Breiner’s guitar playing scrapes and butts up against possibilities, putting on a face to try and make it through the day while the the drums and bass lock into the rhythms of everyday life. 

While much of Next Time laments the state of the world, its best moments are when McD and the band turn their gaze toward personal relationships. “Feeling The Same” is the sound of what it felt like when I was younger and formed all-consuming crushes on girls with dreams of being loved despite my inability to form a coherent sentence because I was so afraid of rejection. McD seems to feel the same, “when I see you stare / I find myself looking down.” Love requires complete surrender, a willingness to show someone the part of yourself that makes you feel shame. The pre-chorus builds on the repetition of “Could I see myself in the heart of another?” before the chorus makes clear that “I’m so fucked up / I’m scared of love.” 

That fear of hurt and rejection often keeps people in comfortable relationships, even with a partner that makes you feel worthless. What makes “New Jersey” such a reprieve is that McD is singing about escaping a collapsing relationship over the record's brightest, most anthemic melody. “New Jersey” is a joyous celebration of abandoning your fears and saying goodbye to someone who never defends you and always treats you as second best. I want to throw my fists up in celebration when McD calls her ex an asshole. You want to laugh along because, fuck it, you can just say goodbye and hope for better. 

That same hope for better that illuminates McD’s exodus to “New Jersey” animates the mid-album cut “Just a Rat.” Over the danciest groove on the entire record, the gang envisions themselves as vermin, and it’s an apt comparison. To someone like Jeff Bezos, are we anything more than a rodent scrambling for the scraps that trickle down to us? When we’re running to the grocery store with a tight budget at the end of a paycheck, how different are we from the rat poking through the garbage? But as McD sings, those with power are scared of the rats, and we’ve got their house surrounded. 

I hope the next time my Trader Joe’s attempts to unionize, they remember the advice Next Time offers. We can’t live in our fear when we have them surrounded.


Lillian Weber is a fake librarian in NYC. She writes about gender, music, and other inane thoughts on her substack, all my selves aligned. You can follow her burner account on Twitter @Lilymweber.

Queen of Jeans – All Again | Album Review

Memory Music

In my head, there are only two possible outcomes in a relationship: marriage or a devastating breakup. Some (my therapist) might call that black-and-white thinking, but it feels real to me. That worry is enough to keep some people from ever forming a deep connection with someone. But is that something that should even be considered? Is that thought process just dooming the relationship before it even gets started? Breakups often taint any good memories shared between a couple, leaving a bad taste in at least one party’s mouth when they look back at everything. Are the relationship’s good times erased because of the last moments? Were the butterflies and giddiness worth the devastation of the end result? I guess it all depends. 

Photo by Brooke Marsh

Philadelphia’s Queen of Jeans tackles these thought spirals on All Again, their first full-length LP since 2019. On the record, Miriam Devora and Mattie Glass recall memories of a lost love, looking back at all the tumults of a modern love story with both rose-tinted nostalgia and near-insurmountable regret. The memories are chronologically scattered but immersive and moving nonetheless, covering everything from the fatal attraction of the hook-up stage to not being able to cut off communication after a breakup. All those gritty in-betweens are dissected in a way that leans into emotion while propelling the story of the album (and the relationship) forward. The erratic storytelling throughout All Again mirrors how memories of turbulent relationships often come back to you: a few good, most bad, but all leaving you with an unsettling feeling deep in your gut.

The record has a song for just about every emotional state you could find yourself in throughout a whirlwind romance, offering a little bit of everything in terms of genre, tone, and instrumentation. Producer Will Yip worked with Devora and Glass to create massive sounds with a more experimental lean which included bringing in Patrick Wall on drums and Andrew Nitz on bass. This results in an LP that utilizes everything from blown-out post-rock to twangy indie folk to build out the pieced-together world of this tumultuous relationship. 

All Again opens with “All My Friends,” an unexpectedly heartbreaking track that drips in good old-fashioned longing. It comes through as a jolt of reality, with the hook “All my friends around / but I’m not home,” emphasizing the type of loneliness that permeates all facets of your life after a breakup. The whole thing has a boygenius-esque sad rock spin (very “True Blue”) with chorused instrumentals that add a consuming intensity. Devora’s vocals cascade through the windy synth textures and warbling guitars, depicting the heartbreak that lingers for the rest of the record. With this first track, it’s clear that All Again begins at the end, tipping their hand and letting the listener know where this relationship ends before even giving you a chance to root for it. The certainty of heartbreak adds context to the songs that follow. It’s like a reminder to listeners: ‘Don’t let any of the following songs fool you, this all ended badly.’

Horny Hangover” immediately throws us back to the true beginning of the romance, speaking from a voice of anger and regret, like looking back and kicking yourself for not noticing all the red flags. The song has a grungy pop lean (like Veruca Salt’s anger mixed with Linda Ronstadt’s heartbreak) that gives Devora space to show off her wailing vocals, as if yelling at her past self. Yet no matter how many times the line “I don’t want you and I can’t stand you” is repeated, there’s something in the delivery that hints these words aren’t as emotionally detached as they may seem. 

The album continues in this ping-pong format, adding a frenetic energy of never knowing exactly where the next song will lead you. Sonically, “Karaoke” gives off all of those sweet feelings of new love until you realize we jumped forward in the relationship timeline again with lines like “The cart’s lighter at the grocery store / I can’t deal with people anymore,” and the idea of being so lost in your own heartbreak that you forget where you are and what you’re doing. It’s a ripper of a track that leans into the post-breakup crazies of trying to move forward without the person you thought would always be there. The shattering line “I’m a stranger to myself” is a gut punch, emphasizing just how much was given to this failed relationship. 

Mid-album cut “Neighbors” is a devastating look at insecurities and a need for reassurance that wasn’t being met. The lyrics “I want it clear / You still feel like we’re okay / That there’s no change” depict an image of someone sheepishly asking their partner if they still love them. Devora highlights a desperate need to be seen and validated that is not being met, yet one song later on “Let Me Forget,” we see her swiftly giving that assurance to her partner after a betrayal. This track paints a picture of someone willing to forgive their partner for just about anything because they’re scared to be alone. Strings, twangy acoustics, and haunting vocals make this one of the most excruciating yet beautiful tracks on the record and left me speechless, mouth agape at the amount of emotion put to one song.

Bitter Pill” provides a rocking emotional release of all the pent-up anger caused by the relationship’s torment. There’s a clear power imbalance at play that has come to a head. Lines like “I don’t wanna bend my mind to anybody’s will / I don’t need you to know what’s real” make it clear that Devora has separated herself from the relationship’s toxicity, something that can only be done with the healing powers of time. It’s a hard rocker with an explosive guitar solo from Glass that complements the angst and vengeance in the vocals. Not to mention, the hook is catchier than catchy: “I don’t want that bitter, bitter, bitter pill,” which I can already envision helping others release themselves from the grip of an unhealthy relationship.

Closer “Do It All Again” mirrors the opening melodies of “All My Friends,” highlighting the powerful cycles these memories hold and our inclination to repeat these unhealthy relationship patterns. The hummed melody of “All My Friends” is even more haunting on “Do It All Again,” sounding like it’s playing through a radio that adds distance and creates even more of a dream-like note to end the album on. The song’s sole lyric, “If I got to do it all again / I’d find you there like I did back then,” shows that even in hindsight, love and desire squash any anguish from the certainty of heartbreak. Maybe it was all worth it in some twisted way? We might have to cycle through the memories all over again to find out.


Cassidy is a music writer and cultural researcher currently based in Brooklyn. She loves many things, including but not limited to rabbit holes, Caroline Polachek, blueberry pancakes, her cat Seamus, and adding to her record collection. She is on Twitter @cassidynicolee_, and you can check out more of her writing on Medium

Lip Critic – Hex Dealer | Album Review

Partisan Records

> It is a Friday afternoon in May of 2024. Summer has yet to begin officially, yet the sun is punishingly bright as it tries to burst through the shuttered blinds of my home. I have attempted to counteract the blistering heat that awaits outside by running the a/c unit of my apartment into overdrive, yet it does not seem to be working: my insides are cooking. I am approximately eight minutes and twelve seconds into the thirty-one-minute runtime of Lip Critic’s debut LP Hex Dealer, and something is happening. 
> My heartbeat has gradually increased as each minute ticks by. I first noticed this reaction precisely four minutes and twenty-three seconds into this listening session, around the closing point of the opening track “It’s The Magic,” when I began to experience shortness of breath and a slight blurring in my vision. There is something living in this album. 

There is something simultaneously familiar and refreshingly new to a record like this, always the surest sign a band has at least the potential to become interesting if they are not right out of the gate. Lip Critic need not worry about the potential of being interesting; they sprinted right past potential quite a while ago with a series of EPs and singles dating back to 2019. Hex Dealer is, in many ways, the ideal form of a debut LP: it is a record that’s overflowing with ideas both musically and lyrically, the unmistakable sign of a band that’s spent years experimenting as they build up the anticipation for what a fully realized album by them could sound like. Now, Hex Dealer is here, ready to punish all who dare delve into Lip Critic’s world. 

> By the third song, my nose has started to bleed. It’s a slight drip, like an old faucet that won’t stop. I can feel my brain pulsating against my skull. It is trying to escape. There is no escape.

All that time I waited
Just to find out I’m from hell
I burn right through
My mortal shell

> It appears I blacked out shortly after my last audio log. The nose bleeding has intensified. Some minor cuts and scrapes have developed on my scalp. I can’t feel them, but I know they are there. I am going to attempt to continue from where I passed out before. 

What to say about a track like “Bork Pelly”? This is the first of two tracks on the record to feature guest verses from other vocalists (in this case, those guests would be GHÖSH and ID.Sus) and also the sort of track that is going to grab the inevitable, and frankly lazy, comparison to Death Grips. Why is it any time a punk band that draws just as much from hip-hop and dance music must always be compared to those titans of trolling? They certainly weren’t the first group to marry that cadre of sounds together. Is it just that they were the first to quote-unquote “breakthrough” to the mainstream? The first band of this ilk to get Pitchfork coverage and major festival slots? Probably. Almost certainly. But there is such a slice-of-life playfulness, not just to a track like “Bork Pelly,” but to all of the output from Lip Critic up until this point, that their sonic forebearers have seriously lacked. Sure, this album is populated with grimy, intense, breakneck-paced songs, but it is also a truly funny and engaging album. 

> There is a warbling synth embedded in the track “Spirit Bomber” that has shifted my pre-existing nausea into full-on illness. The way the notes gurgle has sent my brain into convulsions, though my body is completely still, paralyzed in fact. I am lying here on the floor of my bathroom, incapable of vomiting, but at this moment, for the first time in my life, there is nothing I would love to be able to do nothing more right now than just that. I can feel my organs shifting inside me.
> 47 seconds into “Death Lurking, one of the cuts on the back of my scalp has developed into a larger wound, though it does not hurt in the slightest. In fact, it feels nice to touch. 

> The high-pitched, scraping synth on “I’m Alive” feels akin to white noise, but if it physically hurt to listen to. I have pulled a small (about 3” in length and thin in diameter) bit of what appears to be wire out of the large unfeeling wound on the back of my head. It is covered in a viscous black goo that smells and tastes of nothing.

> The death metal-adjacent growl of “My Wife and the Goblin” feels like a moment of relief from the abuse my brain and body have endured until this point. The bleeding from my nose has stopped. I have continued to pull more frayed bits of wire of varying lengths from my headwound. 

> I have lost a tooth. My body feels like static. The pulse of album closer “Toxin Dodger” has given me the sweet release of vomit purging from my body. It is similar to the black goo that coated the bit of wire I pulled from my head wound. I can now feel bits of wire protruding through the skin on my palms and fingers. There is little of me left how I was before. My body and mind are not what they were. I pick at the wound on my head. It has gotten significantly larger. I can fit almost my whole hand in there. My entire body tingles with static as I pry and feel around gently. 

> There it is. The wire from where all of these bits I have pulled seemed to have originated from. It’s hefty feeling and causes my legs to spasm and pulsate when I grasp on it. I pull on the large wire that appears to be stuck to my brainstem. I tug at it ever so slightly as more and more unspools from the wound in my head. It feels good…
> It feels good. 

Jack Nelson is a writer, bartender, and former stand-up comedian (don’t hold that last part against him) based in Wilmington, NC. He can be found on Instagram and Letterboxd as @itsjackiekeyes. You will soon be able to see him in the upcoming mockumentary Soda Pop Spencer Storms Atlanta. All updates on that and future film projects can be found on the IG for the production company @punisher_skull.jpg.